Still learning...

It’s been a few weeks since the last entry. A quick recap of the RNR.

The morning was great for running, upper 50’s, no rain or wind. I felt ready. That morning we took the shuttle for the first time and the pressure of years past was non-existent, even when the bus was stopped for several minutes to wait for a train to pass.

My goal was as close to 1:30, my PR was 1:35 and some change so I figured anything under that was fine. The weeks leading up my legs had felt GREAT, pushing the hills and being comfortable at pace. The only drawback was I’d gone swimming about 3 weeks before and for whatever reason that really bothered the foot that was fractured over the winter. ???? Whatever?!?!?

The thing I learned from this race was, if it works in practice/training then FOR F**K SAKE DO IT FOR THE FREAK’N RACE DAY!

I always run a 1.5-2 mile warm up then hit what’s on the days schedule for run training. The morning of the race, about 15 minutes before I ran out from the start line and only did a short jog of about .25 mile. LOSER!

I hit miles 1,2,3 all on time and was on pace at just 6:58 per mile. However, from the start my legs were not happy, not enjoying any of this. Tight and heavy, not willing at all, and my left foot started to cramp. Hey something new, why not!

I was still holding my time through mile 6 along the lake and at mile 8, just before the tunnel I had this clear thought like a bolt of lightning.

“If you don’t walk for 10 seconds RIGHT NOW, you’ll walk the last 4 miles in about 2 minutes”

So for the first time in 6 years I walked during a race – ( well sided from the 4.5 hours at IMC ) D’ho

My legs were killing me! I stopped and shook them out and walked for about 10 seconds, got back in a jog and worked back up to pace. I hit the 11 mile marker and was happy to see that even if I ran 10 minute mile pace I’d still have room to PR. I was looking forward to the big downhill actually training on big downs so I’d be able to take full advantage of, but the legs never let me get below 7:00 pace. Bummer!

I have these talks with myself when I’m racing. They aren’t always pleasant, but they are never sugar coated. I always feel any conversation you have with yourself takes your mind off the suffering for even a little bit.

I had to have one of those “yank your head out” moment’s when at just after the 12 mile marker I started telling myself “ OK, todays just not your day, go ahead a slow up and save your legs. Next time you’ll blah,blah,blah…” Less than a mile to go and I’m having this talk now? I yelled at myself to straighten up my form and put my head out of my azz, and quit feeling sorry for myself because my legs hurt. I was keeping 7:20 pace and still on pace to PR. The last bit I got back to 7 minute pace and finished it off crossing at 1:32:40ish 33ish. I can’t remember. But I PR’d : ) by almost 2 minutes…

What I learned

Warm up the same way before a race as you would before training.

This last weekend I ran a little 10K put on at Magnuson Park and did just that. Put in 2 miles of 9 minutes pace 10 minutes before the race and the legs felt GREAT!  See, sometimes all that yelling at yourself in your head pays off….

Don't Call It a Comeback....

Couldn't help it! Things have been going pretty well in the lead up to RNR Half. Legs are feeling pretty solid and the fractures now seem a thing of the past. I don't really think about them much when I run and the phantom pains have gone for the most part.
During my long run at the Disco this past weekend I was feeling like I had arrived at the next step in life. I put away all the self hate and loathing that I bottled up over the last 8-9 months and felt really free for the first time in such a long time.

Looking back over that time...

I heard or read a quote: Only bring the past if you can build on it.

I thought a lot about what that means to me during my run and came to this:

I survived, not always with my head up or clearest of mind, but I got through it. With the overwhelming support of friends and family. Slumping farther and farther into depression, sport and all the things that use to keep the light on and fires burning were just getting too hard to see on my own.

If anything it was the constant support of everyone, and the selfless friend's helping friends without hesitating that amazed me. Over and over again...

So after months of being somewhere else, and feeling like someone else, I feel that a new chapter has started and is fully underway. Running, after the injury, has a different feel to it mentally. I don't feel like I have the limiters that I had even last year as far as what I think I'm able to achieve. Last year was about endurance and reserve. This year is about speed, rest and fun. AND those other old familiar words...camping, hiking, vacation....

Only bring the past if you can build on it. In other words, Remember what you need to, but don't let it dictate your path.

Running again...

Back running again after about 14 weeks out of action do to the fractures in my left foot. It’s been hard finding momentum the last 3-4 weeks and the off and on again pain from my foot doesn’t help much. Up to now I’ve gotten 3 runs a week in, ranging from 3-5 miles and averaging 8:50 minute per mile. Not where I was, but I’ll take it.

It’s funny about how relative things are. You go from situation to situation and then only after do you realize how high or low you were before. The other day at track I was running at 9:00 and thinking ‘I hate this, I hate having to start over”. Then about two miles later I was at 9:15 minute miles thinking how I would of loved to be able to run 9:15 back at Canada last year where 15:20 was the max my IT band could handle from mile 8 on.

This year after thinking about it and having to nurse the foot I’ve decided to take the tri season off and just focus on one race, Seattle RNR Half Marathon, and spend more time hiking and camping. This seems like a good time and I had thought about it before signing up for IM last year. Some may think that I got burnt out from all the training last year, but that wouldn’t be true at all. I loved the training and the team that I joined I just want to get back to a few simple things this year and that starts with no schedules or training plans for a few months. Just packing the car and seeing where the road takes us from time to time.

When I think about it I’ve been training for something just around the corner for over 9 years now, adding up to almost 60 races. I love racing and felt stronger last year than any before, so being burnt out isn’t a worry at all. And I’ll still be swimming, biking, and running with the team, I’m just laying low a bit on the competing side.

However, I am signed up for the one half and I do have a goal in mind for that one. I’d like to get as close to 1:30 on the half as possible. 1:34 is my PR, set at  the Kirkland Half a few years ago, very unforgiving nasty course, urgh! So I think I can pull a close to 1:30 time off. Training doesn’t truly start until March 27th for that. Right now it’s just getting miles on the foot and slowing back into it without any injuries. So far, so good.

Yesterday I hit the first hills running with the team over at Mercer Island and OH MY GAWD! Dying!!! Heavy, flat, wheezing. And that was just the first hill. I was telling Alley that at one point all I heard was I high pitch sound and my heartbeat. That can’t be good? But it’s a start, with an ave. of 8:48 I can honestly say it can only get better.

I long for...

I long for the days of sweat running over hills
Cutting through the water, smooth, reach, pull
“This gets you there, you love this!”

I long for power coming from weak, tired legs
Hips forcing and taking the lead, the rest following
Focus on form, open fields, breathe, relax, glide

I long for cringing at the days schedule, anxious 
Hills at tempo, flats at race, downs steady and safe
Head down, fuel in, this is just training

I long for seeing the lake as a stepping stone
Water trickles off still as the pedaling begins
Each mornings sunrise builds the machine

I long for limits and friends pushed
Stay on my shoulder, - Stay on their wheel
Out too fast, too far pass gone

I long for the shade beneath the trees
Crushing winds, deep in training
Legs aching for the hunt, begging to fly

I long to build towards that hurt
That place that lives in and behind the reasons
On the faces crossing the line, across our limits

This is what I long for...

Just a few pictures from 2010...

A little recap of 2010. Mostly some photos that didn't make it in and some I just wanted to see again. I learned so much from family, friends and teammates. This year was pretty crazy and I couldn't have made it through without Alley supporting me and taking care of everything "behind the scenes"if you will. Also, Sara, Karen, Laura and TN Multisport Team/family for putting in all those rainy day training runs and rides! Maybe mini golf next year : )

Great photo of emotion just before the start of IMC

Little did we know how important this place would be

Poor Pen in the Shark Cage

What a fun race with Matt, Tiff, Alley and Miia. 17 minutes late for the start of the race. Shuttle bus next year for sure!

4 days of touring through this on the bikes. Pretty Sweet!

First flat in two years. At least it was scenic!

Sara and Karen making it to Hanging Rock on day 2 of the tour. Intense climb!

Can't even explain what this was like!

First 100 Mile bike ride...

Sara & Karen at IMC

Waves hitting shore during the wind storm.

Caught in a crazy wind storm Friday before IMC

Just drinking it all in...

Definitely one of my best moments of the year!

Lights out after IMC, long, long day...

WHOA! Alley working the slide!

Alley getting ready to win the second game of the night. Argh!

Long day for Alley, x ray would later find a nasty stress fracture in her leg. She felt it bite her way back at mile 13!

Running the Ballard Turkey Trot w/ friends

Playing in the snow with one of our snow beasts

Easier days after tri season is over...

Early X-Mas?

 

Well the good news is that I wasn't signed up for anything...

Out for 3-4 weeks then we'll see where we're at.

It's been awhile, again...

Ok it’s been awhile. I’ve had a few good updates then waited too long and they didn’t seem relevant anymore so I past on them.  So I thought with the news I got from the doc this morning I had plenty of time now to update and write a few things down.

The last few months I’ve been fairly busy, nowhere near like the beginning of the year, but that is O K… After a few weeks rest from IMC I started back in with track and a few runs just to start back into it. I.T. Band was never an issue after starting up again, always good.

At track we were doing a 5K so we would know where are splits would be for future track workouts. I was excited about the chance to run a 5K, because the legs had felt good all year and I knew they had to be faster than last year. My PR was 19:43 done in 2008 at the Fleet Foot 5K in Redmond, so I was really interested to see what new time I could post. Especially, with the weeks leading into the 5K I was feeling really good.

It was just over 12 laps and I felt great into lap 8 keeping a steady 6:25  + - 3 seconds. I remember thinking  “only 4 more laps, I still feel good.” Then I hit lap 10 and it quickly became real work. The thighs were not happy and they were not shy about letting me know. I floated through the last full lap thinking if I eased up a bit I could get my legs under me again and push the last bit to recover some time. HA! I floated through then pushed it alright, pushed to just keep 6:40 for the last half lap. Argh!!!!

I came in at 20:16, I just couldn’t focus on anything other than the fact that I had not done a sub 20, I was pretty disappointed to say the least. Not sure there alway needs to be a lesson learned around every failure, it just is what it is. I look back on it now and still feel disappointed about it, but what can you do?

A few weeks after that I had a 15K planned over at Magnuson Park, such an odd distance, I was really looking forward to it. It was a small event only about 300 people total for all three event: 5K, 10K, and 15K. It was a windy cold, cold morning, Halloween actually, sunny and no rain. The course was 3 loops of the 5K course, flat w/ only one hill at about the half mile mark that climbs about 2 hundred yards in a stair step pattern. First time up the hill I was thinking not bad, but this is going to suck on lap 3.

By every possible stretch of the word I went out way too fast, hitting mile one at 6:24 with a few dashes of 6:05’s on the opening flat section. Not good! I calmed down telling myself “I will make you walk if you don’t slow it down RIGHT NOW!” My goal was to run it at half marathon pace, so around 7:15, then just throw it all out there for the last half mile. 

Lap one was 20:24

Heading into lap two I had a better handle on pacing and kept in within reason, the hill was much more “hilly” the 2^nd time around. However, once at the top the downhill pays for most of the time lost, pushing 6:15 on the down, but making sure it’s backed off effortwise.

Lap two 22:10:  - Seems way off from 1^st , but this is where I should have been for the whole race.

At the start of lap three I made the mistake of staying with 3 guys that started to pass, moving me from 7:05 pace to 6:50 pace. When we hit the line to begin lap three I was pissed mildly at myself because the three guys moving pass me were doing so because they were kicking for the line only doing the 10K. My only advice that I ever give to someone is “run your own race” and I totally almost blew up because I didn’t follow my own advice.

The hill on the 3^rd lap ssuucckkeedd! Hit a 9:50 pace at the top! Woo Hoo!!! On the downhill I could only top out at 8:10. I kept yelling in my head, stay in , stay in. only 2 more miles.

I started to focus on the guy in front of me, about 30 yards out. I wanted to close the gap on him and stay close. He was running very light and looked great, like a easy run for him. I was pounding away at 7:00 pace bridging the gap slowly. With a mile to go I let loose on a small down to try and get within 5 yards and as I did he used the down as well to slowly pull away. – so close….

The last mile weaves through the trees at first then pops you out on the road heading south for about a qtr mile then straight back north to the start/finish line in a long half mile stretch. I was still focused on the guy in front, trying again to reach him, but into the turn around he had 15 seconds on me. The last bit was really fun, I wanted to dig and just lay down a full out effort to the line. My pace was 7:00 going into the last turn and I managed 6:24 flat out to the line from just over a qtr mile out.

Finish 1:06:24

I pushed as hard as I could of and felt like the result was above what I thought I could of done going into it. I was hoping for a 7:15 ave. pace and ended with a 7:08 ave. There were plenty of times I wanted to stop because the pain was so much. The pain of racing is obviously different from injury pain, but makes you want to stop just as much. It’s hard to explain, but I’m sure plenty of you know exactly what I’m talking about.

At the end the guy in front thanked me for making him race so hard and I thanked him for the same. And I guess that’s kind of what it comes down to, the sport of it. Whether it’s swimming in crazy white caps, snowboarding in the tree’s, cranking up a mountain pass on your bike or running a race and trying to catch the next person, trying not to let the person back catch you. It’s all for the sport of it.

I’ll write about the Seattle half next, just got back from the doc to see what the damage total on that was. Ugh!!!